Asking for help
Curled into a fetal position, incapable of even willing myself to sit up. Repeating my children's names over and over, just to remind myself that I must endure. It doesn't even hurt. I am numb. I hear them cry, daddy is in charge and one is tired and the other is needing cuddles. Mommy cannot cuddle, she is too busy holding herself. I knew these few weeks would be hard. I knew that I was pushing myself too much without taking the time for self care. So it's not surprising that I find myself here. Balled up in my numbness. Still willing myself just to sit up. I manage to open my eyes. The tears abated a while ago, the numbness persists. I feel empty. I feel lost. I feel like I am continuing to fail. Taking care of everyone but me, losing myself a little more each day. I am fighting a losing battle. The comforts of "home" lost in our transition from Kentucky to Georgia. I blame myself for all of this. I see my pain reflected in my son's frustration. His