Part 1: My story #iamnotashamed #mentalhealthmonth
#iamnotashamed This is a recent hashtag I came across during #mentalhealthmonth (May) that I really felt. Deep down. I wrote a post. I edited the post. I hesitated. That's when I knew. I even had some anxiety over it. I didn't have time to write, time is so fucking impossible to regulate and obtain these days. Particularly for myself. I knew I needed to release this burden. But my hesitation let me know that maybe this hashtag struck a chord. I wanted to use it. I want to be unashamed. But the truth is I feel very deep shame. My depression has cycled off and on since I was 16. I think that was the first time I sought help. Sometime right after I started oral birth control, which I would later learn was a direct contributor to my anxiety and depression. I am very hormone sensitive. Even the slightest fluctuations send my brain into a tizzy. Ok, into a personal hell. I would not learn this until graduate school. Thanks, Neuroendocrinology seminar. And thanks