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Showing posts from September, 2015

I'm still running, some days that has to be enough

I don't give myself credit enough for the things I accomplish. For victories small or large.
No. I am far better at picking a part all of my failings (as I call them).
In fact, failure is my go to word.
Pretty harsh for a mama runner PhD.
And yet it's the one word I cannot shake.

F-A-I-L-U-R-E

So, where did failure come from? I didn't start out a failure. In fact I was a pretty good kid, mostly straight A's, rule follower, blah blah blah. Then after busting my ass for four years I missed the IB diploma by one point. Then I was refused entry into every military branch (but apparently if I had lied about taking anti-depressants as a teenager I could have enlisted).
I shrugged it all off, hell I was going to Emory University.
I was still something.

And then I wasn't. Once there I became lost in a sea of "top" students, and I was barely average...sinking in big lectures designed to each us that not every one goes to med school.
I had my first big ME breakdown…